Addicted to the Internet? Lessons in Self-Reflection and Simplicity
Yesterday, my computer got some horrible virus attached to it that attacked with a vengeance. I mean, the fake pop-up warnings were lighting up the screen faster than anything EVER moves on this thing and I couldn’t keep up. I scrambled to find my spyware programs and get things running, but even that was infiltrated and the virus kept corrupting those files each time I tried to launch them. I eventually found some outstanding help on a forum that walked me through a series of steps, and after a few rounds of quarantines, things ended up ok (for now, at least…knock on wood - and I’m not even a superstitionist…but still).
During the hours that all of this chaos was taking place I realized something, and I’m not sure that what I discovered was a good thing. What became quite evident is the fact that, ummm…well, I just might be addicted to the Internet. I didn’t know I was addicted to anything, but the thought of not having access to the parade of sites I routinely visit, caused a little bout of panic to ensue and let’s just say that I don’t think that is a good thing.
Sure, I work online. My business is run through the Internet and of course this blog and most of the freelance writing I do is via the Web as well, so I guess I have somewhat of an excuse. But the anxiety I felt when I wasn’t sure if my computer would ever be my friend again wasn’t really over whether I could get work done, it was sort of about “what will I do if I can’t keep up with everything while it’s out”…and THAT is what caused me to pause a moment and assess things.
That constant cycle of social networking and commenting; tweeting and emailing; stumbling on Stumble and tumbling on Tumblr; networking for my blog and reading other blogs; and, and, and…it’s almost a bit exhausting just thinking about it all.
While I am good at getting my “real work” done in between all of the aforementioned tasks and think that I stay pretty self-disciplined when it comes to keeping my priorities in check, I still startled myself a bit with the realization that I was acting like I NEEDED the Internet.
It’s such a different world we live in now, isn’t it? When I was my kids’ age, I typed school papers on a typewriter and I sat in my room with a phone that had a CORD coiled up on the end of it. I didn’t have Google or Photoshop. I didn’t text my parents and I actually had to unfold a map to find my way to a music concert. I’m not saying I wish things were still like that for my children (or for myself, for that matter), but man, there was something sort of nice about that simplicity (though I didn’t realize it was simple in the slightest at the time).
The more I thought about it though, the more I realized that getting back to a level of simplicity and peace was really all up to me. The gadgets and advancements we have today are amazing. The opportunities we have to correspond and reach out to people who we might never get to meet otherwise are incredible. The things we can accomplish and the speed at which we can multi-task? Sheesh…it‘s mind-boggling if you really think about it. And as cool as all of that is, I realized yesterday that it’s also such a tiny part of where I want my focus to be.
I love my time online and the access I have to such a vast world which opens up with mouse clicks and keystrokes, but I also love a lot of other things on the other side of my computer screen that might get pushed aside from time-to-time when I get too wrapped up in the world within the web.
Reminders come in all sorts of disguises. And while malware is probably my least favorite of the masked suggestion methods, in a really odd way I’m somewhat glad that I had moments to pause and reflect on my time, my life, my focus and my priorities. You can’t change what you don’t acknowledge, eh?
Friday, July 2, 2010 at 8:52AM
Reader Comments (5)
Very well put Miss Jinxi. I had a moment like that last week when my internet connection failed for almost 24 hours. I thought I was going to go crazy.... then I remembered there are other things in this world that I enjoy so I picked up a book and was a-ok. I guess we really do need a nice smack of internet abstinence every once in a while huh? :)
jinxi--great topic. I have reached the point where I now write my magazine articles long hand again, the computer not even turned on for fear of the seductive distractions it represents...checking facebook, email, my vlog, your blog, etc.
if you send me your email, i will send you a .pdf of my latest Men's Health article on the health benefits of nature. One of the sections deals with how videophilia is seriously eroding time people spend quiety contemplating (and being restored by) exposure to nature.
When I have to write on deadline, I set up a pad if paoer on my dining room table and when I need a mental relaxation break, look outside and the trees and slate colored juncos and nuthatches!
Great article, Jinxi. My gf and I have had intermittent issues with our internet/modem/laptops for almost a year now. Yesterday I couldn't even get online and I full-on panicked. What will I do if I get "out of the loop"? What if my "news" tomorrow is already old news to the rest of my community. Wait. Who is my community anyway? Several friends of friends of friends on social networking sites I've never met before but know far more intimate details than my own warm-blooded real life friends and family do.
I get email updates from a book club site weekly which has reminded me I started reading The Heroin Diaries almost two years ago, and have yet to finish and comment on it. TWO. YEARS. Why can't I be bothered with paper items anymore? Because I'm busy letting people that I don't even know that I "like" a blog, then "like" what another stranger's comment on that blog might be...
So after my mini-meltdown yesterday I took the time to play around with my two dogs. I drove to my girlfriend's office and took her to a Vietnamese grocery store and we slowly perused up and down each aisle in complete wonder and amazement of what treasures the store held. We purchased some rice paper, fresh veggies and peanut sauce and hand-rolled our own crunchy chicken Vietnamese spring rolls for a fraction of the price we normally spend when we buy them at a restaurant.
I also got to dye my hair back to it's original color instead of spending countless hours bemoaning my reflection in a mirror and the time it would take to fix it. Amazing how getting "disconnected" allowed me to connect with my real life again for a day.
I know the feeling. I loved reading through this article, this will boost my will of do what i have to do to have my working time on pc set up and after that computer off!!
if I leave home and not check my usual website i have the feeling that something is missing and that feeling wont be gone untill i hav tick all those boxes. If my internet is done, I get in a bad mood and cant really concentrate untill the problem is solved. At the moment I am tryng to set up a daily working time on computer,and till now I am not managing to do so. But it will have to be sorted soon.
tks for the post
Yes! What a wonderful thing to meditate on!! Within the past few weeks, I've had a few conversations with Lily about how tired I am of my BlackBerry and it's constant updates sent to my email which then get forwarded to my phone. It's great to feel disconnected from the Internet, even if the first few days seem hard. I think turning in time on the Internet to read or just lay outside or turning in your smartphone for a simple one are becoming more and more plausible to me.