A Letter To My Kids: My Declaration of Acceptance & Love

I had an odd thing happen to me recently. I was eulogized as someone I used to be. I know that sounds odd, because I am me - always have been, always will be. It's true that I have found courage through my years to put others' expectations behind me, striving every day to stay loyal to my heart.

I understand that there are some who will simply never be capable of getting past appearances; will never be able to understand that the blinders of faith are not for everyone; that the dreams of one are not the dreams of all. I get that. I do. It's unfortunate, but it's reality. 

I have come to a place in my life where I simply must not dwell on this regrettable actuality. I feel obliged to live for today; appreciate every moment; love and nurture my family and friends; be in this game for what I have come to understand is MY reason for playing it.

I might look different than I did in younger years. I might not subscribe to the same ideologies that I once did. I might have chosen an alternate path, one that isn't familiar to most. But you know what? Underneath my skin and in my heart, I am the same person I always was.

I may have encountered epiphanies along the way that lead me in my own direction, but I believe those were positive and would never change any of them. Not one.

While I could let the innuendos deter me and dwell upon them, I decided that today I would turn it around and make a declaration. One of love and support. One of unconditional love. I write this to my children: Brynn, Shea, and Aidan; so that when they are 39 years-old, or 18, or 24, or 89...they can read it and know that I mean these words with all that is inside of me.

Dear Brynn, Shea, and Aidan,
 
I want you to know how much I LOVE being your mom. I love that I get to know you and share parts of your journey in life. I adored you from the moment you were born. I will always adore you and my love for you will grow every day.
 
I know that there will be times in your life when we might not see eye-to-eye. I think that's normal and not negative. I understand that you are living your life, not mine. While I am given great responsibilities to teach you things when you are/were younger, I always do/did so knowing that these are only stepping stones to helping you find your own path.
 
It's ok if we have differing opinions and ideas. Don't ever be worried that you can't share them with me. I want you to use your own brain and skills to find the happiness and understanding that you deserve.
 
I will always love you.
I will love you no matter what your hair looks like.
I will love you no matter what your skin looks like.
I will love you no matter what you wear.
I will love you no matter who you love.
I will love you if you believe in something that I don't. I will love you if you don't believe.
I will always love you.
 
Be kind to others. Do the most you can with what you know. Strive to learn and work hard to get better at what you love doing.
 
Enjoy each phase of your life. Make each year better than the one before. There is no such thing as "the good old days." Don't believe that! Make the here-and-now the best that you've enjoyed yet.
 
Be in love with someone who deserves you and treasure that love by appreciating each other. Don't settle for anything.

Find your passion and dream big!
 
Remember that this life is yours, not mine. My dreams for you are that you are "living your dream" - no matter what that is and no matter how you look while you are getting there.
 
I will always appreciate the person you are. Feel free to remind me of this if it seems like I don't. Because I am so proud of you and I love you more than I can find words to type.
 
Thank you for reading my letter. Thank you for being my child. Thanks for bringing sunshine to my life.
 
Love,
 
Mom